Hey there little man. Its been a few days since we sent you a note but it has been another few days of nothing but questions without answers. Days like that we tend to wait to write your note, hoping beyond hope that we will get some of those answers in the time spent waiting to write the next note. As usual though, we have not gotten any of those answers and we are no closer to understanding exactly what it is you are trying to tell us.
Before I get into the news of today I have to tell you about some really special play time from yesterday and a really special gift you got all the way from southern Kentucky. Yesterday morning your Pappaw drove up to see you and guess what you two got to do?
Yep! You played together in his arms for quite a while. He held you and kissed you and made all kinds of goofy faces at you and he even let you pull on his beard. I know you don't know it yet but that is a pretty big deal for Pappaw because he doesn't like it when people touch his beard. But you two had a blast and you were as happy as I have seen you in days. It was like you found a new kind of happy place that only Pappaw's can provide. I know about that place, I have been there before with my Pappaw and I cannot tell you how happy I am that you finally got to find that place with your Pappaw.
He also brought you a present from your Mammaw, one that she has been waiting to give you for a little while and one that will remind you of your daddy's Pappaw too.
Its a piggy bank. A BIG piggy bank. This piggy bank can hold you inside if we need a place for you to hide. But it is a special gift from your mammaw and your mommy and daddy are going to start trying to get it filled up for you. We will make sure and send her a picture of you with it over to her and tell her just how much you are gonna love it. You sure do have some family out there that loves you.
And now to today. Prior to this morning your mommy and I have been jolted into our day in the pre-dawn hours with a phone call from your nurse with some sort of news to report on your night. Today was the exception to what we feared was becoming the rule but when we did get over here to your room this morning we were greeted with your screams and a look of exasperation from your nurse. She looked at us and said "he knew his mommy and daddy were running late today". I know that probably isn't what was going on at all buddy but just in case you were wondering you should know that your mommy and I were just making sure we had a little bit of time to recharge for another day here in the hospital after such long days recently.
But you were upset, whatever the reason was behind it doesn't really matter because you were throwing up two hundred's on your heart rate monitor and turning a crazy set of colors between red and purple and pale. There was a very small dose of good news though, you were definitely happy to see us and did calm down some once we got to talk to you and pat your little belly and chest. At that point you weren't mad anymore, you were just agitated. I know that maybe those two words sound similar to you but there is a clear difference lately and that is one of the biggest questions your mommy and I have actually.
You stopped clenching your hands and squinting your eyes and holding your breath. You stopped screaming at us and you were no longer getting purple (just a very bright red). But no matter what we tried we couldn't slow your breathing down and we couldn't get you to sit still for more than a second. You were wiggling and fidgeting and squirming like there was a colony of ants crawling on your body. Mommy and I tried everything we could think of to calm you down but we just couldn't quite do it. Eventually we gave in to the nurse and had to give you a little bit of chill out medicine so you would relax. Even though you are doing so much better and your heart seems to be chugging along just like we would want it to no one wants to work it too hard right now if we can avoid it.
The doctors have a theory that they are testing out right now and will hopefully be able to fix some of the issues you have been having this week. Unfortunately mommy and daddy don't like the theory much and aren't sure if they are right but we trust them because they are great doctors and have done a great job getting you better every other time there has been a problem. The bad news about this new theory is that they are going to have to basically take you back a week or two worth of steps when it comes to your medicines. You are going back to I.V. medicines and the doses are all going back up. If they are right then this will stop the fevers and get you ready for the surgeries we missed on Friday with your fevers.
And I know you are wanting to find out when those surgeries will be but unfortunately we just can't tell you yet. A lot of your doctors have been talking about them and they all seem to want them to happen sooner rather than later and your mommy and daddy can't agree more. We think that maybe it is time to get those surgeries checked off the list and see where we stand after the dust settles from them. And if that is going to be our approach then lets hope we can get the surgeries Tuesday and not have to wait until the second half of the week. We will cross our fingers, you try it too.
They are implementing some news rules at the hospital starting tomorrow too. Because of the beginning of flu season the hospital is going to limit the people who can come back to your room and visit you. We thought that meant only a few people could visit but that we could decide who those people would be. That is not the case. It will only be a few people but we don't get to decide those people after all, it will only be parents and grandparents allowed back to see you. That means no more visits from your uncle Scooter and auntie Beth (or your new GF as we discussed...) for about two months. That is a LONG time for a little guy, more than half your lifetime!
So of course when your auntie Beth and uncle Scooter found this out they jumped in their car and raced down here to see their favorite little boy in the whole world. They got here a little while after the fit we mentioned earlier and you were still a bit zonked from the medicine the nurse had to give you. But that wasn't exactly a bad thing, it did lead to your favorite part of the whole day and a pretty big spot opening even wider in auntie Beth's heart...
Sorry daddy forgot to close the door in the background buddy, lucky for us auntie Beth is a wiz with pictures and will be able to fix that little oversight for us so this picture can get framed and hung up a few places. Its one of many great pictures we got of you today, here is one more I think you should see because it is all three of you together.
After they had to leave you spent some time watching football with your mommy and daddy until Grandma showed up and took us to dinner and played with you while you were awake. You had some fun with her and then played with mommy until you finally tuckered yourself out. Now we are winding the day down and getting ready to try and sleep and get all reset and recharged for the week coming at us tomorrow. We know you can handle it but some of us lesser beings need a little bit more time to reboot.
Keep up the good work Connor, we know you are doing everything you can to get better. I hope you know we are so SO proud of you. You are our hero little man. But for now sleep tight and sweet dreams.
We love you Connor.
- Daddy
1 comment:
lots of love to you all! you are never far from our thoughts and prayers. Nikki and Josh, take good care of yourselves, too. your love and faith and strength is so inspiring- I can't imagine how impossible it must feel sometimes, but you are doing an amazing job. Connor is a lucky little man to have such spectacular parents.
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